Forgetfulness

For behold, I create new heavens and a new earth;

And the former shall not be remembered or come to mind.

But be glad and rejoice forever in what I create;

For behold, I create Jerusalem as a rejoicing,

And her people a joy.

I will rejoice in Jerusalem,

And joy in My people;

The voice of weeping shall no longer be heard in her,

Nor the voice of crying.

Isaiah 65:17-19 NKJV

The water was almost warm, delightful on our feet, its spray grasping the edges of our rolled up pants. 

We laughed and we watched a great kite soar over the expanse and the seagulls swooping low in the soft blanket of sky above, and the waves licking the salty sand, reaching and then drawing back. 

And then we sat on the ocean's sand and ate doughboys and licked sugar and sand from our fingers and delighted in the swiftly dipping sun casting golden shadows over the melting day, the delicious air cooling us off and playing with the ends of our humid-sticky hair. 

There, all of a sudden, a thought came. I had completely forgotten about a project that I had been working on. A project that was taking time and energy and that I was fretting over at times. I had completely forgotten about it in these delightful moments soaking in the beauty of the Lord's creation and majesty. 

I had forgotten.

Another day, and I was sitting on the porch swing, taking a short break from the heat with my 1-year-old on my lap while my 2-year-old daughter and my mom threw crumbs of bread to the sparrows sweetly hopping around on the grass. 

A little group of sparrows drew my eye. There they sat, a happy gathering in the golden afternoon sunlight, basking in the provision and protection of our yard, chirping and enjoying the beauty and peace of the late afternoon day. 

Thinking of nothing but their present contentment and safety. Forgetful of fear.

These isolated incidents, these cherished moments reminded me of a truth in the Scriptures and brought me comfort and joy. 

The truth of forgetfulness. 

Of the day that the Lord will wipe away every tear from our eyes, when we will behold Him in beauty and majesty and light . . . 

When we will no longer be able to remember the things that brought us sorrow and pain and suffering. 

When we will be like Him, gazing upon Him, worshiping Him, delighting utterly in Him.

Death will be swallowed up in victory. 

The former things will be remembered no more . . . no longer will they come upon the heart.  (Isaiah 65:17)

Free to worship. Free to praise. Free to know Him completely and without the distraction of sin and its effects. 

Free. 

And forgetful. 

Of hurts and tears and sighs and losses and sorrows and tears. 

Remembering His mercy, and delighting in His love for all eternity. 

You might find me on these link-ups:

Strangers and Pilgrims on Earth, Inspire Me Monday, The Modest Mom, What Joy is Mine, SDG Gathering, A Mama's Story, Mom's the Word, Rich Faith Rising, Time Warp Wife, Cornerstone Confessions, Mom's Morning Coffee, Motivate and Rejuvenate Mondays, So Much at Home, Raising Homemakers, Hope in Every Season, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home, Woman to Woman Ministries, Whole-Hearted Home, Testimony Tuesday, Tell His Story, A Soft Gentle Voice, My Daily Walk in His Grace, Women With Intention Wednesdays, Messy Marriage, The Charm of Home, Graced Simplicity, Theology Thursdays, Children Are A Blessing, Mittenstate Sheep and Wool, Imparting Grace, Preparedness Mama, A Look at the Book, Essential Thing Devotions, Thought Provoking Thursday, Every Day Jesus, Count My Blessings, Christian Mommy Blogger, Renewed Daily, Soul Survival, Good Morning Mondays, The Weekend Brew, Blessing Counters Link Party, The HomeAcre Hop, Mommy Moments Link Up, Grace and Truth Linkup, Faith Filled Friday, Saturday Soiree Blog Party, Tell It To Me Tuesdays, SHINE Blog Hop, Faith and  Fellowship Blog Hop, Motivate and Rejuvenate Monday Link-Up, A Little R&R Wednesdays. TGI Saturdays Blog Hop. Totally Terrific Tuesday, RaRaLinkup

Grace in Small Places

He also brought me out into a broad place;

He delivered me because He delighted in me.
Psalm 18:19

I'm learning that God's grace comes to us in surprising places . . . 

And many times that His grace comes in small places, in unexpected places, in places that the world looks over, but that the Lord sees as His stepping-stones to glory.

The manger, a small place, that held the glory of the Son of Righteousness, the Firstborn of creation. 

A small basket, whose five loaves and two fish fed 5000 and a small boy who offered the meager and the small. 

A small following - twelve disciples - whose testimony through the Lord's power shook nations. 

The Lord works through small things, so that His glory may shine greater through the impossibility of it all. 

And that all the glory is His alone. 

I'm in a small place right now. 

I didn't think of it as small when I first married, when my husband and I made our "home" in my Mom's home 5 years ago. 

It was cozy then, and we didn't need a lot of space; it was adequate, and we loved living with my Mom and still do. 

But then, the first baby came along, a little girl, and things got "cozier." 

It was still alright, though, and became a little easier when my Mom offered us the spare room for her to sleep in just before I gave birth to our second child.

A little boy. 

And I thought, how am I going to do this, fit all of our things, keep everything organized, stay sane? 

Add to this that my Mom has her house up for sale and most of my belongings are in storage. 

And that I am by nature an excessively organized person - for better, or for worse - and that I feel like I'm losing it when things are "out of place." 

I felt overwhelmed. And I looked at the clutter around me, the organized clutter, but clutter nonetheless, and I felt like it was closing in around me. 

And the space seemed so small  and I envied my friends who owned homes and even the ones who had apartments and I thought, if only I had more space. 

If only I had more space . . . 

If only I could organize my baby's toys and books . . . 

If only I could find Elisha's baby book - it must be packed away somewhere . . . 

If only, if only, if only. 

But the Lord constantly speaks to me in this small place, and though I still struggle with discontentment, I ultimately would not have it any other way.

Because this is His will for me right now. 

I know, I know, I know that He has placed me here for this time and that at the right time, He will bring me out into a spacious place. 

There are lessons that I have learned in this "small place" that I could never have learned anywhere else. 

So I would not change anything. 

And this small place holds blessings, hidden blessings, when I look beyond the "littleness" of my own thinking. 

My mother's constant loving influence on my children and the Godly advice that she offers me on a daily basis . . . 

Learning contentment in a "small place" so that by His grace, I may not take His provision for granted if He should choose to place me in a larger place . . .

My sister's help with my daughter when I was healing after giving birth to my second child . . .

My family's constantly stepping in to watch my babies for doctor's appointments, etc. 

So many blessings, countless blessings. 

And I'm reminded -

Reminded that the Lord works through the small, through the insignificant for
His glory.

And I believe that He will work through my small place, too. 

He's humbling me, teaching me to depend upon Him, softening my nit-pickiness into surrender. 

Sometimes we want great things, big things, when the Lord often works through the small. 

We want greatness, and then the Lord teaches us that to become great we must first learn to serve (Mark 10:35-45).

That He takes widows' mites, and poverty and our lack of ability so that He can work His glory and strength through our weakness. 

He works through small places . . . and then in His perfect timing, enlarges the pathway under us, so that our feet do not slip. 

So I hold onto this promise, and thank Him in the meantime for the grace to grow in this blessed small place:

“Enlarge the place of your tent,

And let them stretch out the curtains of your dwellings;

Do not spare;

Lengthen your cords,

And strengthen your stakes. 

For you shall expand to the right and to the left, 

And your descendants will inherit the nations, 

And make the desolate cities inhabited." 

Isaiah 52:2-3

You might find me on these link-ups:

Strangers and Pilgrims on Earth, The Modest Mom, What Joy is Mine, Yes They Are All Ours, Missional Call, A Mama's Story, Mom's the Word, Rich Faith Rising, Time Warp Wife, Cornerstone Confessions, Mom's Morning Coffee, So Much at Home, Raising Homemakers, Hope in Every Season, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home, Woman to Woman Ministries, Whole-Hearted Home, A Soft Gentle Voice, My Daily Walk in His Grace, Messy Marriage, My Teacher's Name is Mama, The Charm of Home, Graced Simplicity, Children Are A Blessing, Mittenstate Sheep and Wool, Imparting Grace, Preparedness Mama, A Look at the Book, Essential Thing Devotions, Count My Blessings, Beauty Observed, Christian Mommy Blogger, Renewed Daily, Soul Survival, Good Morning Mondays, Oakhill Homestead

Here With You

Mama . . .  Mama . . . MAMA! 

My little daughter panicked, frantically calling my name. 

I had rounded the corner to take something out of the closet in our room, and she couldn't see me, didn't hear me, didn't know where I had gone. 

So I popped my head out and she saw me and she ran into my arms, relieved. 

And I hugged her close and touched her tiny face and reassured her little soul, "Debbie; Mama isn't going to leave you . . . "

It was one of my worst fears as a child . . that I would get lost and not be able to find my Mom in a store. That I would be left alone and not know what to do. 

It happened in the library once. My Mom left me for the story-time for the first time--she was nearby, on the same floor, listening with one ear and looking at books. 

But I couldn't see her and I panicked. 

I didn't know that she was right around the corner. 

So I started to cry and they found her . . . 

And my Mama reassured me, "I'm not going to leave you; I was right here all the time." 

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed in this marathon of mothering. 

Where every moment is filled with little voices who need me now, who rarely let me sleep or have a minute "off." 

And this is God's will for me right now--to nurture these souls that the Lord in His mercy has entrusted to me for a season. 

But sometimes I get caught up in the chaos of it all, and I lose sight of the Lord, of His pillar before me and His cloud of fire by night. 

I get lost in the crowd and I just can't see Him. 

And I panic. 

I just don't have the time that I used to to spend in uninterrupted prayer--I often have to "pray as I go," pop in a sermon tape, pull out my Bible while my children nap, and make the most of the opportunities that I've been given. 

If I stay up too late at night, I have a hard time functioning the next day, especially with babies who still don't sleep through the wee hours. 

And sometimes through the tiredness, through the constant "going," and picking up babies and putting them down and feeding them and praying with them and disciplining them and loving them, 

I lose sight of Him.

And like my daughter, I don't know where He's gone. 

So in my moment of anxiety, I call His name --

I search for Him.

And I find that He was right there the whole time. 

Waiting for me to notice that I couldn't see Him for the moment, waiting for me to cry out for Him, to run into His arms in my need. 

Waiting to hold me-- 

And to touch my face with His peace and calm and quiet and trust and tell me, 

"I'm not going to leave you."