Monday, October 17, 2016

A Woman Who Fears the Lord

Note: This post is part of a series of posts on marriage/relationships. I pray that this "mini-series" would be a blessing to you! Please feel free to share any of your own thoughts in the comments; I would love to hear them! 

You may read the Introduction to the series HERE

Last week, I shared some characteristics of a man who is sensitive to the Spirit of God. This week, I'd like to share a list of qualities of a spiritually-sensitive woman that I brainstormed. I pray that these insights might be an encouragement to you as you ponder and pray over them--I know that they have challenged me--

In my own interactions with other believers and in my reading, I have often come up against the either stated or implied idea that a woman's actions will change the heart of her husband.  I have heard teaching on this subject that places guilt and responsibility upon a woman's shoulders that was never placed there by the Lord in Scripture. Biblically, we are called to--

be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.  (I Peter 3:1-2 NKJV)

The key word in that passage is "may." Not "will," but "may." All that we can do as believing women is to obey the express commands in Scripture, keep our focus upon Christ (not upon our husband, ultimately), and pray--sometimes with fasting. Will the Lord change the heart of an unregenerate or unrepentant husband? He may. But He never in Scripture places the responsibility for our husband's conversion or confession upon us. Each person is responsible for their own sins before God. Our husbands will stand or fall before Him for his own sins, as we will for ours. The important thing is to keep our eyes fixed upon Jesus Christ--and the outcome is in the hands of the Lord. 

I don't believe, and I am coming from a very Conservative background and interpretation of Scripture, that a woman needs to "cower" beneath a tyrant. And I see this principle strongly played out in the life of Abigail (see I Samuel 25), who respected and obeyed her husband, but only until his will conflicted with her Heavenly Father's. We do not blindly submit (and I'd like to go into this subject more deeply in another post), but for now, I will just say that we are only responsible to do what we are commanded in Scripture to do. No more. And that will eliminate so much of the worry and fear that is placed upon women in marriages today who are desperately trying to fix their husbands and go to any lengths to do so. I'd like to delve more into this subject in another post and so I will conclude this one now with the list of character traits of a godly and gracious woman. May the Lord help us and give His grace to us in every way as we seek to become more like Christ! 

A woman who loves Christ Jesus with all of her heart (Mark 12:30)

A woman who knows and loves Scripture (Hebrews 4:12, John 8:32, Psalm 119)

A woman who encourages her husband in the ways of the Lord (I Thessalonians 5:11)

A woman who is strong in the Lord~powerful examples~~Jael and Deborah (Judges 4), Esther (book of Esther), Ruth (book of Ruth)-- to name a few.

A woman who will not compromise under pressure (Matthew 24:13, James 1:12))

A woman who loves her children and makes sacrifices for them (Titus 2:4-5)

A woman who puts her own needs after the needs of others (Philippians 2:1-4)

A woman who gives generously (II Corinthians 8:1-15)

A woman who trusts God with her future (Proverbs 31:25)

A woman who clothes her family well -takes care of the needs of her family (Proverbs 31:21)

A woman who is sensitive to those who are hurting (Colossians 3:12-13, Proverbs 31:20)

A woman who is not frivolous (I Peter 5:8-9). And I cannot help interjecting here Mr. Knightly's words from Jane Austen's Emma--"Men of good sense do not want silly wives!" ;-))

A woman who is thrifty  (Proverbs 31:27)

A woman who brings honor to her husband (Proverbs 31)

A beautiful woman--beautiful because she reflects Christ (I Peter 3:3-4)

A woman who walks by faith (II Corinthians 5:7)

Please join me next week for the next part in this series! I am hopeful and excited for how the Lord will work through our marriages as we submit ourselves to His leading and love. 

You might find me on these link-ups:

Strangers and Pilgrims on EarthInspire Me MondayLiteracy Musing MondaysThe Modest MomWhat Joy is Mine, A Mama's Story, Mom's the Word, Rich Faith Rising, Cornerstone Confessions, Mom's Morning Coffee, Raising Homemakers, Classical HomemakingA Wise Woman Builds Her Home, Woman to Woman Ministries,  Testimony TuesdayTell His Story, Women With Intention WednesdaysMessy Marriage,  Graced Simplicity, Children Are A Blessing, Imparting Grace, Thought Provoking ThursdaySoul SurvivalGood Morning MondaysThe Weekend BrewCounting My BlessingsThe HomeAcre Hop, Mommy Moments Link UpGrace and Truth LinkupFaith Filled FridayTell It To Me TuesdaysSHINE Blog HopTGI Saturdays Blog HopRaRaLinkupWord of God SpeakBooknificent ThursdayLiving Proverbs 31Sharing His Beauty Blog LinkupCoffee For Your Heart Weekly LinkUpYou're the Star Blog HopHomesteader HopFresh Market Friday


  1. I'm glad you stressed that our responsibility is to obey God. Only God can save an unbelieving husband. Sometimes that obedience will help show her husband his need, but you are right, the wife is not ultimately responsible for the husbands actions or decisions. Thank you for reminding us of the characteristics of a godly woman. May God help each of us shine forth His light and beauty.

    Blessings to you! I'm your neighbor at #inspirememonday.

  2. Thank you for spotlighting God's beautiful plan for men and women to glorify Him through marriage.

  3. Rebekah, your list is extensive and straight from scripture. It's always right to turn to God's word for direction. I like how you've kept us grounded there. Blessings to you. Visiting via #raralinkup.

  4. Bekki, Wonderfully edifying post on the character traits of a Godly woman. Your list and the Scripture verses to back those character traits, are such an encouragement to live and breathe Christ and in so doing, all of our responses to life, no matter what the circumstances, will be filled with joy in the Lord. "Come to me all who labor and learn from me, for my ways are gentle and my burden is light."

    Your posts are always such a blessing sweet friend.

    And happy belated birthday! I'm sure it was wonderful to have all your family around and in the same State! :-)

  5. I love what you've said here, Rebekah. I agree wholeheartedly and am so grateful for your list of Bible verses to more clearly understand the role a woman has in marriage and life. We cannot change our husbands, but we sure can influence them! Thanks for this!

  6. So grateful for your careful delineation. Keep speaking truth and encouraging in the Word on this often misrepresented subject- the Lord's Word is powerful to change us!

  7. I enjoyed reading this! It is so important to remember these traits and apply them to our marriages, and our families. I truly believe that when we submit first and foremost to God, He moves on behalf of our marriages! Thanks for your encouraging words! I am excited to be your neighbor this week over at Faith 'N Friends link up

  8. Thank you for this reminder of many of the characteristics of a Godly woman. You made a great point that we are not called to bear the responsibility to change our husbands. I think we as women sometimes try to take on that job when we notice our husbands' weaknesses, but that generally does more damage than good.