Take the Simplicity of Every Moment and Teach It to Your Children

As a mother, I am continually asking the Lord how I can "connect" with my children--in other words, how I can teach them and lead them to the place where they might step into a life of service and love for the Lord, how I can nurture not only their bodies and minds but also their hearts and their souls. We live in an age where everyone is so "connected"; via social media, through easy transportation, through every new and bright form of technology. And really, true communication, true connections have been greatly lost. Why? We live in a distracted and distanced society and culture. Everything is at our beck and fingertips and yet we have really lost touch with the greatest reality of all--the living God--manifested in His creation, in our hearts through faith, in the simple and quiet pursuit of knowing and following Him in spirit and in truth. We are distracted by the cares of this life and they eat away at the fabric of a consistent Christ-centered, focused mode of living.

Our connection with Him is frayed at best and at worst, lost. He is some distant Grandfather in the sky to which we turn often only when something is wrong. I see this attitude of "distance" many times in my own life--there are so many day to day distractions, so many things that "need" to be done, so many enticing forms of entertainment around us, that we often lose touch with what is really important. We think that the temporal things are so necessary when Christ would have us embrace the spiritual. Until we find our connection with Him and lay aside every weight, it will be impossible to truly connect in a sincere way with those around us. In my own life, when the connection to Him is "strong" and the distractions are laid aside, I am able to reach out to the lives that He has placed in my pathway in a deeper and more connected way. 

I have been blessed in that the Lord led me to live in the country. Here, there is not as much noise and distraction materially, yet I still feel and sense that old-Adam tug of my heart toward being distracted--mentally, spiritually, emotionally--I have to constantly remind myself of what is eternal and important--to pursue those things--and often that means laying aside other perfectly 'legitimate" things that I might otherwise do and focusing my eyes and heart on what is eternally important. 

He comes in the stillness. And one of the lessons that He has been impressing upon me lately as I've been praying is to continually "simplify" everything with my children. I write about it here as maybe it will be helpful to someone else. I know that the Lord has been using this lesson in my own heart. 

We need to be present with our children. Period. We can be stay-at-home-moms and not be present with our children. We can be distracted by a million and one things--we all know what distracts us personally and have felt the tug of conviction on our hearts. We know when we are ignoring our children even if we are there with them physically--we know when we are selfishly pursuing our own interests and pushing them into the background of our lives. It's an attitude of the heart that daily should be rooted out like a weed in a an otherwise good garden. And the deeper we allow its roots to grow, the harder it will be to pull out. We need to be vigilant about uprooting weeds of distraction and the cares of this life. 

I've been asking the Lord how to interact with my children (I have a 3 year old and a 5 year old) and this is what He has spoken to me personally--take the simplicity of every moment and teach it to your children . . . talk to them about everything around them, relate it back to the Lord--not in a way that is forced, but out of a heart connected to the Lord--as the outflow of that--

A feather on the ground, 

The robin singing before it rains, 

Ingredients going into a bowl of cookie dough,

A pie crust being rolled out

A hymn softly sung

A prayer for a hurt animal

Seeds being pressed into the ground of the garden

Paint being spread over a board

An earthworm fat and sleek being placed gently back into the soil

An anthill so determinedly built marveled at

A rainbow in the great Midwestern sky

The work of a rake exposing the beautiful green grass under the deadness of winter . . . 

The list goes on and on and on--and I think that this is why my own childhood is so vivid and bright to me---my own mother took the joy of each moment and pressed it into the hearts of her three daughters --in such a way that it has had a lasting impact upon my life. 

Everything in God's creation was sacred in some sense to my Mom, not in some strange mystical way, but a in a real, flesh and bones, joy-infused existence. She gave that joy to us--in so many ways, through the literally thousands of books that she read to us, through her constant relating everything back to the Lord, through her beautiful rich voice singing songs to the Lord as she cleaned our house, through the constant sacrifices that she made to make sure that we went to a Christian school through our younger years. 

The Lord has been bringing that lesson to my heart--to take each moment that He gives and to use it as an opportunity whenever I see it to impart some small grace to my children.  It has been a learning experience for me. 

Children, even very young ones, can be a part of so much of what we are doing--making a bed, cooking, cleaning, raking, again, the list goes on and on--and the more that we teach them when they are young, the more that they will be a help to us as they grow older and feel a part of our lives--

We are tempted many times to let children "go off" and play by themselves when we could include them into so much that we are doing--not everything of course and not all the time of course--but many times. 

This connects our children with us through day to day life--try it--I find that when I pursue this that my children are less "distracted" and more focused--I am better able to connect with them and to nurture their sensitivity toward spiritual things. The task often takes "longer" to complete, but I feel a great sense of joy when I am not rushing through completing everything on my "to-do" list and involving them. We are both enriched--I in slowing down, and they in being a part of what I am doing. 

We have been taught some great lie that children are a burden--it often niggles at our hearts--if they weren't "in the way we would be able to pursue the important things in life. 

Maybe what we think is important really--isn't. 

Children are a blessing from the Lord--near and dear and close and real flesh and blood--not just to be shuffled off to someone else--not just to be let loose to bring themselves up, not to be showpieces or badges of honor that elevate our own pride, but tiny spiritual beings--

Nurtured, loved cherished, taught--to the best of our ability--by the grace of God--and for the good of our own hearts. 

Teach them simply--and simply teach them--Involve them, include them, connect with them, love them . . . 

Let the little children come. 

You might find me on these link-ups:


Inspire Me Monday, Literacy Musing Mondays, The Modest Mom, Raising Homemakers, Classical Homemaking, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home, Woman to Woman Ministries,  Testimony Tuesday, Tell His Story, Messy Marriage,  Imparting Grace, Thought Provoking Thursday, Soul Survival, Good Morning Mondays, The Weekend Brew, Counting My Blessings, The HomeAcre Hop, Mommy Moments Link Up, Grace and Truth Linkup, Faith Filled Friday, SHINE Blog Hop, RaRaLinkup, Word of God Speak, Booknificent Thursday, Living Proverbs 31, Coffee For Your Heart Weekly LinkUp, You're the Star Blog Hop, Homesteader Hop, Fresh Market Friday, Heart Encouragement Thursday , Sitting Among Friends Blog Party, Fabulous Warm Heart Party, Oh My Heartsie Girls Wonderful Wednesday Linkup, Writer Wednesday, Tea and Word

Keeping Things Simple With Little Children

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The other morning I asked the Lord for an idea of what to write about on this blog. Lately, I've sensed the Lord urging me to write more so I came to Him for wisdom.

That same morning I had a conversation that sparked the idea for this blog post. I believe that He answered my prayer for a topic to write about and so I want to share what was placed upon my heart with you. 

I was talking with my Mom about a subject that led her to encourage me as a mother to keep things very simple with my children. Her words really struck me, encouraged me, and convicted me to wholeheartedly pursue what I believe the Lord has called me to as the focus of my life right now--to be present with my young children physically, spiritually, and emotionally. My calling right now is to raise my little ones up in the ways of the Lord. Sometimes I feel that calling like a burning in my bones and sometimes I pursue the calling out of a desire to obey and then the feelings come, but regardless, I pursue it. 

My Mom encouraged me that morning to "keep things simple" with my little children. She reminded me not to get caught up in the rush of activity or the pursuit of things other than what the Lord has called me to do at this time. Her gentle words of wisdom stuck with me and I found myself thinking about them during the day. We are surrounded by distractions, things that are not necessarily wrong, but may keep us from fulfilling the Lord's will for our individual lives with all of our heart. The world that we live in with its fast-paced rush of activity, the distractions of social media, the ins and outs of day-to-day life, among other things often try to rob our focus away from what is vitally important and what will truly and deeply nourish our souls and the souls of our children. We are better off living a simple life in the light of His presence than a fast-paced, distracted, stressful daily existence in the pursuit of things apart from the Lord. We can begin that kind of Christ-focused life with our children . . . What does it mean to keep things simple? Here are some thoughts that I had that I'd like to share with you.

How do we "keep things simple" with little children?

~Pray about what you take on. Not everything is ours to do. As we prayerfully bring ideas before the Lord, wait upon Him for an answer of whether He wants us to take on an extra responsibility or not. Or even a business venture, as small as it may be--because it will probably, in some way, take away from the precious time that the Lord has given you with young children. Make sure that the idea is from Him before you pursue it. As a stay-at-home mother, I am often looking for ideas to bring in extra income for our family. To be bluntly honest, I often worry about ways to bring in extra income for our family. And even through that worry, I always see how the Lord provides for us, even at the last minute. He has always been faithful to provide for our family as we have taken steps of living by faith here in the Midwest. I know at this time that the main focus that the Lord has called me to is to be present with my children in every way while they are little. If something distracts me from that focus, I believe that the Lord wants me to lay it aside for a time. Maybe in the future He will give me the "go-ahead" to do it--but not now while my kids are very little. It is not worth it in the long run no matter how appealing it may seem at the time. It is better to do a few things well, things that He has called you to, and let the other things fall to the wayside. You will be thankful in the long run that you did. Live for Him and don't let anything distract you from your main calling, whatever that may be at any given time in your life.

And I want to add here that it is certainly not wrong to have a small business or a hobby or another outlet or enterprise when one has little children. What I am saying is that we have to ask ourselves if these things are distracting us from our primary calling or if they are supporting our calling and enriching it. My Mom often took on part-time work once we were school-aged, at times bringing us with her. But it was always very evident that her heart was anchored in her home and that the part-time work was done in support of what she believed to be her primary calling. The important thing to ask ourselves is when we pray about it, sincerely and honestly before the Lord whether His pleasure is upon us or not. And if it is, then take joy and pursue whatever it is that He has called you to in accordance with His will. If not, surrender it to the Lord in submission and trust.

~Connect everything back to the Lord. In my life with my children (they are ages 3 and 5 right now) I have tried very imperfectly to connect all of life back to the Lord. What do I mean by that? I mean that as I walk and talk and go throughout the day, I bring the Lord into the conversation, even in trivial matters. We begin our day with Him and we end our day by kneeling beside our bed at night. I play hymns on a CD at times during the day. We are very careful with what movies we watch--I try to protect them from the deluge of sarcasm and triviality in the media that I truly believe is killing our children spiritually and causing them to think lightly of the things of God. When we talk about different subjects during the day, I try to connect them back to the Lord Jesus. For example when it snows out I try to point out that the Lord gave us snow today; how beautiful it is! He is present with us all the time and so I try to bring that reality into focus with my children. The more I am distracted or if we are too busy as a family, it is a lot harder to consistently do that. And so I try, by the grace of God, to keep our activities simple and limit the time that we spend "out." I really believe that children benefit deeply from a home-focused life and that it is within the sphere of the home that they experience the workings of the Lord through every aspect of daily activities and through a mother (and father when he is home from work) talking all along the wayside with their children and bringing the Lord consistently into the conversation, not in a way that is forced but as the outflow of a Christ-focused life. 

~Have (even) young children help you with daily tasks. This will slow everything down (believe me :-)) but it is worth it.  Having your children learn alongside you to sweep or vacuum or load a washing machine and dryer helps them--and you in the long run. Doing simple things together helps build a relationship of closeness with one another and fosters an attitude of hard work and helping. This has been an area in my life that I have fallen short of many times as I try to clean things up "quickly" without interference. I love to clean and sometimes it becomes a fetish with me. I am working on allowing and requiring my little ones to help me in day to day tasks. It is worth it to slow down and include your kids rather than always just letting them play or read while you work or clean. I am not suggesting that you always do it (there are times when you just need to get something done quickly and can give your kids something constructive to do while you work) but do endeavor to bring them alongside you at times throughout the day to build closeness in a simple way.

~Get out of those stores and stay at home more. 
Don't get caught in the trap of always running in and out of stores. Be organized and focused in your shopping so that you are not always constantly dragging your kids into stores (they will get sick less, too! :-)). Keep meals simple when kids are young.  Keep toys simple. Keep holidays simple, beautiful, and Christ-focused. A child is content with very little if they are trained from when they are little to be content. Use the outdoors as a school to train your kids up in the ways of the Lord. Be outside with them in the Lord's world. There are myriads of simple, wonderful things to do outdoors with your kids. Grow a garden, walk in the woods, play in a field, draw and read outside. And do these things at times with your kids--don't always just unleash them into the backyard with barely any interaction with you. Be present in and out with your kids; talk to them along the wayside as you do your work. This is an area that I am working on in my life with my kids. One of the things that has helped me in this area tremendously and I am grateful to the Lord for it is having to share our minivan with my husband. It just keeps me home more and eliminates some distractions for me at this point in my life. 

~Stop worrying about money--trust in God
I write this one especially for myself. Make sure that you are doing what He has called you to do and then trust Him to provide for your family. Has He called you to stay at home with young children? Then do it with all of your heart and He will provide for your family; I promise you that. You may have to eat simply, live simply, and make sacrifices, but it is all worth it. Or maybe your children are school-aged and He will provide a way for you to make money doing part-time or other work. Whatever your situation, pursue the Lord. Don't chase after money or financial stability in a way that takes matters into your own hands apart from His counsel to your heart in the best interest of your family and children. Make sure you are doing His will and then trust Him. He will faithfully provide for your family, even in unexpected ways. I have seen this time and time again in my life. George Mueller has long been one of my examples in the faith and I have sought (again very imperfectly) to walk by faith as he did with finances. I cannot begin to tell you how the Lord has miraculously provided for our family many times as we have waited upon Him.  He is faithful to provide. We have this false idea in our minds that we always need more--kids are very happy with very simple things. My kids are fascinated with packages of rubber bands for example and can be occupied for vast amounts of time with simple thing like this! (rubber bands are very cheap, you know :-)) They also love to bake with me and as my Mom says, how expensive is a little flour and sugar? :-). Again, hours of wholesome fun. Use free resources like libraries, parks, and nature trails. Keep things simple, creative, and fun. The Lord will bless you and enrich your lives through them. 

And I would add here, just as a side note--be generous. Give in the ways that the Lord shows you you can. We are so afraid with parting with our money when we have little. Do the best you can with what you have, don't go into debt, and give as you are able. George Mueller used to pray that the Lord would provide him with funds so that he could give them away to support other believers. His mindset was a heavenly one and this showed in the way that he was able to easily part with the things of this life. He lived simply and generously for the Father's glory. Our lives become simpler when we leave provision in the Lord's hands, do what is ours to do, give generously, and wait upon Him. . . 

These are just a few of the ways that you may encourage a simple, Christ-focused life with your kids. There are many other ways as well--the Holy Spirit will direct your heart as you pursue Him and seek to please Him in raising your children. Remember, Satan wants us to be distracted, to live undisciplined, self-focused lives so that we don't accomplish anything for the Lord's kingdom. Our own flesh craves busy-ness and distraction. Seek the Lord. Follow Him. You will never regret pursuing a simple, Christ-focused life with your children. And they will bless you for it in years to come. You have one opportunity to build a legacy for your children. Don't waste it, but take His grace day by day and He will teach you how to live for Him with your children; I promise you that. 

Two Resources that you might find helpful and that have encouraged me:

Edith Schaeffer: The Hidden Art of Homemaking
Elisabeth Elliot: The Shaping of a Christian Family 




You might find me on these link-ups:


Strangers and Pilgrims on Earth, Inspire Me Monday, Literacy Musing Mondays, The Modest Mom, What Joy is Mine, Rich Faith Rising, Mom's Morning Coffee, Raising Homemakers, Classical Homemaking, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home, Woman to Woman Ministries,  Testimony Tuesday, Tell His Story, Women With Intention Wednesdays, Messy Marriage,  Graced Simplicity, Imparting Grace, Thought Provoking Thursday, Soul Survival, Good Morning Mondays, The Weekend Brew, Counting My Blessings, The HomeAcre Hop, Mommy Moments Link Up, Grace and Truth Linkup, Faith Filled Friday, Tell It To Me Tuesdays, SHINE Blog Hop, TGI Saturdays Blog Hop, RaRaLinkup, Word of God Speak, Booknificent Thursday, Living Proverbs 31, Coffee For Your Heart Weekly LinkUp, You're the Star Blog Hop, Homesteader Hop, Fresh Market Friday, Heart Encouragement Thursday , Sitting Among Friends Blog Party, Fabulous Warm Heart Party, Oh My Heartsie Girls Wonderful Wednesday Linkup, Writer Wednesday

When Things Were Simple . . .

We sat all-childish in the old orange booth, swinging our scuffed-up legs beneath us. The sun filtered in through the wide, large-open windows facing the street, when there weren't so many cars out to clog them and the days themselves seemed more simple and free, less bogged down and cluttered by activity.

Stores used to be closed on Sunday and the largest retail outlets were the old Ann-and-Hope and the Ames around the corner in East Providence. There were no Wal-Mart superstores to lose your mother in or to walk around for hours trying to find the person that you were with. 

Life was simpler, even those seemingly-brief years ago when I was a little girl and we used to frequent the then "Mister Donut" in Seekonk. 

It was always the square apple muffin that I chose. The lovely square apple muffin with the sugary caramelized apple chunks that weren't even close to being nutritious, but gave the aura of a nutritious lunch. That, and a small box of milk.

And once in a while, when I went there with my Dad, I would get a chocolate sprinkled donut, just to be like him. Unless, of course, he ordered the coffee roll, in which case, I was banned from eating such a large and "expensive" pastry. 

We usually went there with my Mom. Now that I look back on it, I think that she brought us there to "break up" the long hours in her stay-at-home-Mom day, a respite in-between visiting one of the libraries that we used to frequent where we would sit for hours while she read book after book after book to us. 

It was always exciting to enter into that warm and delicious-smelling donut shop, where we would take the teetering tray to our booth, the tray that was adorned with chunky glass plates and the silverware that used to be returned and washed at donut shops. None of this "throw-everything-away-culture" mentality back then.

We sat at our booth and watched the men who speckled the round-raised seats at the counter slurping their coffee and chatting away into the sunny afternoon. 

Every crumb was carefully savored, every drop of milk drank and we wiped away the happy remains with a delighted satisfaction. 

Things like that were meaningful to us as children. We didn't "have a lot" and so we were content, satisfied with the "simple." 

And I watch children nowadays in donut shops, one greasy hand gripping a large-sized coolatta, a heavily-laden, whipped-cream-confection, their other hand grasping an expensive bakery sandwich.

And I watch them halfheartedly partake of their decadent lunches, and then crumble a quarter of the remains into a nonchalant pile of rubbish and toss it unthinkingly into the trash can. 

I'm thankful now that I was raised without a lot of "stuff." I see it now as a gift from God that we were always struggling to make ends meet so that my Mom could scrape us through the Christian school that we attended and give us piano lessons.

I see it as a blessing now that our vacations were simple, uncluttered camping trips, that we ate a lot of meals of hamburger and beans and shepherd's pie and macaroni, that our refrigerator was never heavily-stocked.  

It made me more deeply grateful for the special times in life, for the occasional cupcake at school, for the delight of the holidays, and made me anticipate my birthday all year long when I would get to choose the kind of cake that I had. 

I'm glad that my Mama kept things simple when we were little . . . It made me treasure the important things and checked me from taking them for granted. 

It's harder now to do that . . . There are restaurants and fast-food pit-stops on every corner. Stores are open 24-7 and you can get what you want whenever you want it. 

Convenience is a blessing and a curse. 

Kids walk around in expensive clothing and carry technology with them wherever they go. Their minds are distracted, caught up in all of the random, suffocating clutter of this age. 

Clutter and noise that pushes out the gift of quietness and walking in the woods and resting by a stream and listening to the birds sing and the crickets chirping at night.

Noise that pushes out the voice of the Creator. 

I think that I liked it better when things were simple. 

So I try and the Lord gives grace to raise my babies the way that my Mom did. Without a lot of stuff -- whether by necessity or choice. 

If I have to choose, may God give me grace to choose the simple. 

I want my children to be in an atmosphere where they can hear His voice--there are enough distractions around already. 

The simple, uncluttered way that leads to Jesus. 

1.Photo credit: roboppy / Foter / Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)
2.Photo credit: Qfamily / Foter / Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)